Giggles and Shits
Seven years ago, there was a Krampus Rumble. Four years ago, Yeti Confetti sought his revenge. Now... What remained of the elven and reindeer army has come...to fuck shit up. Televisions around Simul played various little shows and news broadcasts. The evening for the normal household still enthralled in the new technology, sitting upon their couches and chairs and splayed across floors, watched whatever their hearts desired. Something funny then happened. At exactly 5:22 PM, every TV and telegem chimed. One bell. Then two. Then a haunting third chime echoed. The screens went black. Then bright. "Simul sucks!"
The unbodied voice screeched. White knuckled fingers gripped the sides of a piece of aged parchment as they held it up against the screen, making damn sure anyone paying enough attention could see and read it.
"We are coming for you! Meet us in eight days on the bigg-highest mountain in Eld-Uld-Aldermans! Long live the Confettis!"
Every screen that had been taken over would go back to its previously schedule crap, leaving everyone who had bore witness to whatever fuckery THAT was to wonder...and eventually, put two and two together. The Confettis were now haunting Simul from their graves through their army of tiny terrors and flesh-eating mammals. Who will become the hero against the stank and explosion brigade?
Winners:
1st Place: Stacy Carson Prize Chosen: Doom Dasher
2nd Place: Silver Drafaylum
Prize Received: Fartillary Ornament
UPDATE
Screenshot from current channel
Starting Date: 12/5/2025
Staff will Announce in the Channel
End Date: 12/10/2025
Or Points Depleted (Staff Announcement) Rules
📌You can bring as many characters as you like, but each one will have their own score
📌To better keep track of your rolls, please utilize /join_event before rolling. Once the event ends, you can use /leave_event to calculate and track your rolls
📌This event will not require posts, however, they definitely add to the hilarity. Take note of the previous events in this series. We are encouraging short posts, so please disregard the post limit.
📌Staff will be throwing random posts out. They will include pings for those participating.
📌There is a pool of 1000 (Subject to change) that need to be depleted (Pool for enemy hit points)
📌Scene will take place in the channel Travel NW. Yes, the event is taking place in the Alderman, however, that channel gets much more use, so it will be easier to track in the travel channel
How to Play
📌You can roll 1d20 every hour (60 minutes or more between each roll)
📌Every roll is a hit, and you decide how many enemies your character either kills or incapacitates. The choice is yours.
📌Posting is highly encouraged, hence why staff will be throwing in their own to help facilitate the funnies
📌The winner will be the person who eliminates the most enemies (The most points rolled)
Prizes
📌The winner will be crowned a custom role title of "Snow Slaughterer - 2025" and one of two prizes. The Second place winner will receive the item that the winner does not choose. Both winners will be placed in Glory and Honor alongside their most epic post:
📌 Option One: The Fartillary Ornament. This heavy, glass piece is not what it appears. Inside, a gruesome looking gas swirls unendingly, glinting from the dangerous shards within. The user is able to throw this piece of 'explosive' toward an enemy, and once it makes contact with anything other than the user's hand, it will explode, sending the epically named Fartillary in an area of five feet in any direction. This deals not only blunt and cutting/shredding damage to the target while simultaneously shrouding view, but also a nightmare inducing stench that rivals a poisoned corpse. Once the item explodes and deals it's rather unfortunate damage, it returns to the user's hand, completely pristine and ready to use next turn. This item cannot be broken despite shattering being its thing.
📌 Option Two: The Doom Dasher. This amazingly bad ass looking sleigh not only has seats that will have your ass asking what cloud it is sitting on, but also the speed of sound. Kinda. Sorta. It's fast, okay? I'm talking fastest moving vehicle currently inside of Simul. The Doom Dasher is ready to pick up and ship off anything and anyone you need. Spacious enough for four people and enough storage for at least three of the dead reindeer that power it, this mode of transportation will have eyes darting the moment it goes by. Not saying they will see you, but they sure as shit will hear ya coming and going. Once seated, the ghostly apparitions of the deer you have slain will appear and prepare to lend their strength to carry you to any destination. Know what's cool about that? No need to feed or water them. And no poop. That's the best part.
The Army
📌The elves are small, but pack a PUNCH. And by punch, I mean glittery fartillary. I shit you not, but they may. Using attacks made of flatulence and glass shard like ass sparkles, these little fuckers will run up on your, shart their shit, and then spontaneously combust just to kill you with themselves. Don't ask how they still exist. I don't know.
📌The deer, of rein proportions, eat flesh. All flesh. They give no fucks whether it is yours, the elves, or their own fallen brethren. They also smell bad. Like...vomit inducing bad. Like, "Please kill me so I don't have to smell this because this shit is never coming out" bad.